Mr Goldilocks right here, thank you very much

So Goldilocks was still in the baby bears' bed when they showed up and that is kind of like me.

So I promised Josh that I would take him to Seven Peaks because my work was having a work party with food, swimming, and a 50 foot movie once it got dark. Well I was really excited to be going over at 6pm for this. He has been at my mother-in-laws because Melanie is out of town at girls camp. Well between Wed night getting 45 mins of sleep (I was helping Melanie get packed) and Tues night only getting 4 hrs of sleep, I was pretty exhausted. Usually at my two am job I am able to sleep too because the calls don't come constantly. But yesterday my phone broke at home and wouldn't work, so instead of working at home I had to go into work, and that means no sleep. So this is just painting the picture as to how incredibly tired I was yesterday. So I got home late because of all of this as well (in fact I had to grab my Spitz sunflower seeds just to make sure I would stay awake), and then had to fix my computer problem. Well by two o'clock in the afternoon after having had 4.75 hrs of sleep in almost 3 days I was wiped out. I went to sleep right away, as in within about 3.5 seconds of laying down.

I woke up in a daze as to why it was so dark, I had set my alarm for 5 o'clock, and was really confused that it hadn't gone off. I looked at the clock and it read 9:15pm AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH. Oh no, Josh is going to be soooo upset, so I called immediately over to my mother-in-laws and her phone is busy, I try the other line and she answers. She had just got the phone book out and was calling the police to find out if I was okay. I had missed something like 13 calls on our home phone and like 4-5 calls on the cell phone. I talked to Josh and he was so kind and understanding, I told him that we would go to the Veteran's park today, just he and I, and he was totally cool with that. He was noticeably unhappy about the whole thing though. I felt so bad. I usually don't flake like that, but I guess my body took over and told me who was boss. So I am looking forward to enjoying the day with him after my morning nap.

I'm Going on Vacation Dad!

So Josh comes upstairs all dressed up in his suit and tie, I am still working in the front room. The joys of being at home. I would have missed this had I been at regular work. I ask him why he is all dressed up and he says "I am going on vacation, can you pretend that you are my dad? I am married and have kids, so you are their grandpa too okay?" Okay I say to him. What is your wife's name? "Her name is Celestia!" So what are you going to do on vacation? "You know go to hotels and stuff, and go on U-turns you know?" I laughed, I don't know what going on u-turns means but it sure sounds fun. I just asked him what they were and he explained just what a u-turn is. I asked why it is fun, and he said that it was fun because you slide around and then you go the other direction. He said that it was with Melanie, so I am assuming that she was driving really fast. He says she was only driving "a little fast, you know the speed limit." Haha, he is so great, the joys of having children. He just told me that he was going to take off his shoes so I could read this to him, and then he would put them back on when it was time to go on vacation again. I love my Joshie, he is so wonderful.

Did you know...

I was coming home from running errands and I had the kids with me. We were driving by the Provo temple and Josh said to me, "Mom, I really want to go to the temple". I asked him what he wanted to do there, he said he wanted to smell the flowers and watch the fountains (aka play in them). So I decided, what the heck, I don't have a real pressing day today, why not! So I took him up there and we parked at the bottom parking lot. As we were walking toward the temple Josh tells me:
"I love the temple Mom. I wish I could go inside this one."
"You will when you get older."
Then he takes off running toward the temple and says:
"Temple! Here I come" (haha)
I let him play for a about 10 mins. (It was HOT!) As we're walking down the path, he says:
"Mom, did you know that I just felt the Holy Ghost?"
"No, I didn't. That's great Josh!"
"Yeah, I think that any time I want to come to the temple you should bring me."
"Yeah, we can probably work that out."

He's so dang cute! I love this little guy! I love that he's recognizing the Spirit. Children are such tender mercies of the Lord!

Can you Say Ouch!!!

So the other day Melanie was driving our relatively new mini-van, yes I have a van, that I never said I would own. But the reality is that I think it is the most affordable, most efficient, and comfortable vehicle for us for right now. Anyway she ended up looking off to the side for a moment, and when she looked back, she found that the traffic had abruptly somehow found its way right in front of her bumper, enough time also to slam on her brakes, and slip right under the bumper of the car in front of her, she had 4 kids with her, and it ended up looking like this.

Needless to say it is not very cool, in fact it will cost $7,597.96 and 15 business days, that is 3 weeks w/o my van, oh the pain! What a glorious thing it is to have insurance. So I guess we shall see as to whether this will be a good fix or not. Small accident (in comparison to others), big price to fix it.

Ragged Old Flag

You should each listen to this song, it is number 16 on our playlist. I love our Country! It gives me goose bumps, listening about the amazing nation that we live in. I believe that She can take a whole lot more too, and may we stand up for all that we love.

Leap of Faith

I wanted to share something that my sister share just earlier today in an email, but I should really get permission first. This is from my sister who is the most eligible. I say this because I have two sisters who are married, one that has been seriously dating someone, and then another who isn't. I think that she is amazing, and her insights are amazing too. This is a story along with her insight at the bottom.

Okay, so this is the best part of my week. At work on Wednesday, after school and lunch, we were supposed to have horses group, but the schedule got changed around a little and we did RT first (that's recreational therapy). I never get to participate with my girls in RT because it is never on my shift and I was especially excited to do RT with them that day because we were going to be doing a part of the high ropes course, a task called the leap of faith. I had been wanting to do the high ropes course for a long time, despite my fears of it. So, each of my girls was supposed to climb to the top of a 20-30 ft totem pole, stand on top of it, do something that was a specific task for each of them and then jump and try to catch a trapeze. My task was to stand on one foot on top of the pole and tell a really big lie and then jump. Well, did I mention that I am very afraid of heights? Yeah, well I am...Very VERY afraid, but I wanted to do it because I have this big thing for over coming my fears (there is a book called feel the fear and do it anyway...I have never read it, but I think we all should do that). I climbed to the top of the 10 ft ladder and then started up the pole on these little pegs. It was really scary for me and I would go until I couldn't go any further because I was shaking so bad and I would stop and breath deeply until I had my shaking under control and then I would keep going. I had to do this 2 times going up. Then the last part, I had to get on top of the pole with nothing to help me, nothing that I could grab onto and not much space for me even to stand. I had my arms around the pole and knew that I couldn't go up any further and was shaking so badly. I breathed, but still couldn't go on like I had been able to with just the climbing. Despite the fact this this was really not that important of a thing, it was just a task to do with my girls, I really wanted to accomplish it, despite that fact that my fears would not allow me to continue with the task. So I prayed. I had recently been studying about the enabling power of the atonement and had come to understand that the atonement gives us the capacity to do things that without it, we are not able to do at all, things that are important for us to do. Now I recognize that in the eternal scheme of things, getting on top of this pole was of little consequence, but it was really important for me, but like I said, fear paralyzed me so much that this task was beyond my capacity. I prayed that I would be able to do this through the power of the atonement and I was able to get a knee of top and then I was able to get a foot of top, praying the entire time that I would be able to accomplish this thing. All I had left to do was get from my knee onto my foot and stand and I would be able to do the rest. I told everyone down at the bottom that I didn't think I could do it though, and I really didn't think I could, I was so scared. All my girls and staff and therapists that were there started cheering me on, telling me that I could do it. Now here is the funny thing. I am very much a social person. I love people and I want to be around people and have them to support me, but at this time of intense fear, I didn't want them there cheering me on, I just wanted my Father's help, so I asked them to please be quiet for a moment and I pleaded with my Father to help me do this impossible task. I started to get to my other foot, but I made a mistake and I grabbed the rope that was connected to my harness. Because I did this, I ended up pulling myself off the pole and not only that, but I sent myself into an out of control spin and I almost hit the pole a couple of times. The lady belaying me though kept me from hitting the pole and lowered me and some people at the bottom caught me so I stopped spinning and my belayer let me down. When I was on my feet on the ground though, I was so dizzy that I had to kneel down to get a hold of myself till I wasn't so dizzy.

So this is what I realized as I reflected on this experience on my way home. We are asked to do so many things in this life that are difficult for us. We are asked to climb poles that we don't have the capacity to climb on our own, poles that scare us so much that we become paralyzed. However, just like the belayer and the rope, Father in Heaven holds us up and keeps us safe as He gives us the strength to do things that we cannot do. Sometimes though, we make mistakes and we do things that we have been told not to do and because we forget what we have been told because of fear or stupidity, we throw ourselves off the pole we have been asked to climb and we throw ourselves into an uncontrollable spin, but Father still catches us and prevents us from killing or seriously injuring ourselves, both physically and spiritually. We still have to live with the consequences of our mistakes and in order to complete the task we have been given, we have to begin that climb all over again and keep doing it until we can get it right, but He is always there holding us up, and He puts people there at the bottom to help us stop spinning so that we can be on safe ground again. It's not just the jump off the pole that matters, the entire climb is a leap of faith, but when we put our faith and trust in Him, He helps us to keep going and He keeps us safe and He gives us the capacity to do things that we have absolutely no ability to do. I love my Father for what He has given me through the atonement.


Here is an expansion of this and my own story...I had the chance to do the same thing at the Clas Action Ropes Course, it was a 40 ft pole, and I don't think it had a name, but it was way up there, and at the top there was a ring to catch a hold of, it was way out there, in fact, I don't know how far it was but much too far to reach it, you had to jump for it. I have never really had a hard time with heights, you know roofing and all, however, over the last few years though, I have had a much harder time with it. In fact there have been a couple of times that I have actually gotten queasy just looking over the edges of whatever. So I am climbing up and did just fine with that, but got to the top and froze, I kept looking down and I couldn't do it. I was terrified, but "knew" that I shouldn't be because I was harnessed in. I had seen several people jump and miss it (the ring), or after they had jumped were lowered to the ground when they let go. So I knew there was nothing to be afraid, but I was still scared. They started to cheer me on, and I said, OK just let me gather myself, and be quiet. They were nice enough to be quiet and let me gather my thoughts. I focused on the ring and I "saw" myself jumping, reaching the ring and grabbing on to it "spiritually" so-to-speak you know in my mind. So then I quieted myself a moment longer, and then I jumped. I did catch the ring and hung on for dear life, not because I was scared any longer, but to savor the moment, ALL of my fear was gone, the adrenaline had of course kicked up several notches and I can still remember it like it was yesterday. Finally I let go and was brought safely to the ground. I had conquered the pole!

Here are a few of my own insights on the same...I believe that we are all "harnessed in" by what our Savior has done for each of us, he is the person belaying and the gospel is the harness. He protects us from any drop, ledge or precipice from getting hurt/killed, as long as we follow exactly as we have been taught, unfortunately we are kind of like my sister sometimes, we choose to do things too close to the edge. We chose to go up on top of a pole that is way up there that has no real protections from anything, except the harness. Some of us are even more than dumb and we take the harness off while up there, or at the bottom, and we give up all hope. Sometimes we listen to the people at the bottom and we get offended and then we take off the harnesses of the gospel and we leave the church/jump. Sometimes we say there is no reason to go to church, "because I feel closer to my God when I am fishing, etc." Well living the gospel isn't easy, it isn't meant to be, do you think that you can actually become more like God from something that is easy? You aren't necessarily supposed to feel the spirit all of the time or as much as you might occasionally feel while fishing. But here is a question for you, when was the last time that you went fishing and you had the opportunity to renew all of your covenants with our Heavenly Father? You didn't because you cannot. THAT is the entire reason why we go to church on Sundays. There are other benefits too, just like there are many benefits for fishing, but none of them compare to what the sacrament does for us. It allows us to be "as if we were" baptized every Sunday and made clean again, made whole.

Sister and I took two different kinds of approaches on the same thing, she mentions that we are asked to do hard things, and I mention that sometimes we go to the edge of temptation or sin. Either way we have the opportunity to be harnessed in by the gospel of our Savior Jesus Christ, and belayed by the best person to do the job, the only perfect person, Jesus Christ himself. I know that we all can receive the empowering effects of Faith so that we can conquer whatever challenges that we get to face, and that we can receive all of the benefits of the Sanctifying effects of the Atonement while coming back from almost killing ourselves spiritually from temptation and sin. This is all more than real, it is true! I know that He lives and that he loves you and that he loves me.

BTW Sister just called me on the phone and gave me permission to share this with everyone.

Ratatouille (Sometimes you have to indulge yourself)

So I was wanting to make something out of the zucchini and the yellow squash the other day and decided that Ratatouille was the dish to make, so here are some of my pictures to prove it. Melanie really liked it, I thought it still needed something. I served it with baked chicken and couscous. Sometimes I like to cook, and sometimes I over-do it. Ask me about my blackened turkey that I did a few months ago.

A Tribute to Blaine - my Brother-in-law

So a couple of weeks ago Nicole had a "birthday party" for Blaine, with all of the family on both sides. We released 3 dozen helium filled balloons in the air for Blaine to "have" from us. It was very surreal for me to watch those balloons go up to him. Sometimes I think I still grieve at his loss, mostly for Nicole and the kids, but I guess that I still get to "heal." Almost every time I see Utah Lake I think of Blaine. I believe that I think about him now more that he is gone. I think of Nicole and pray for her and her children often. I miss Blaine, but I am glad that I know where he is. I know that I will see him again someday. Nicole, always know you can count on Melanie and I to be there for you. We love you!

So here is a poem that I thought was fitting.

High Flight

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds, - and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of - wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hovering there,
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long, delirious burning blue
I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or eagle flew -
And, while with silent, lifting mind I've trod
The high untresspassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.
John Gillespie Magee, Jr


I don't know if this will work but I found a video of trees being planted in memory of Blaine, Ray and Les in Jerusalem. So we shall see.

I Love my Country, The greatest one on Earth!

Way to go Jerome. I stand at your side with pride to call you my brother. I wish more Americans would "see" exactly what is going on and stand up for their beliefs. I love my country! May we all stand out like Jerome and stand up for what we can turn back to, the fundamental roots that our forefathers set up to ensure our freedoms of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, and religion, and all others that we have been given. Oh how I feel for our grand nation, may we ever be true to her foundations, so we may stand when no one else will.

Jason Crane

"July 8, 2009

Last week Glenn [Beck] got a call from a very impressive young man named Jerome Hudson, who told Glenn he had written an op-ed during the 2008 election on being a black conservative. He sent it in and it's fantastic. Enjoy!

While attending a black fraternity party, I recently learned it’s a bad idea to profess one’s affinity for Glenn Beck, Bill O’Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, and Sean Hannity.

Worse, according to current polls, it appears I may be the only black 22 year old in America who will be voting for Sen. John McCain.

It’s not that I was unaware that being a black conservative Republican puts me in the ultimate “minority.” After all, Shelby Steele’s classic article “ The Loneliness of the Black Conservative” has become an article of faith that I’ve all but committed to memory.

But I guess I had made the mistake of buying into all that liberal yammering about being “open minded” and supporting “diversity” that I’d deluded myself into believing that a civil, discussion about the herd-like ideological mentality of so many of my contemporaries suffer from was possible.

Boy, was I wrong. Big time!

My official “Negro” card got stripped away. I instantly lost my “blackness.” And now, consequently, I now am greeted with this: “Hey, y’all, here comes The Black Republican.”

And that’s when I think to myself, Hmmm…so this is how it feels to be an "Uncle Tom."

Still, being labeled “The Black Republican” is undoubtedly a promotion from: "Hey, why are you dressed so nice? You got a job interview or something?" Or, worse, “Man, why are you talking like that? You sound white? Who do you think you are? A conservative Kanye West?”

But my path to ideological emancipation began where all the most important things always begin—with my father and mother. Growing up, my Army drill sergeant father was a firm believer in tough love. My parents instilled in us Christian values. But I believe that first part—having an involved mother and father—was critical. With 70% of all black babies being born out-of-wedlock, it’s no wonder black poverty remains entrenched, welfare has become a way of life, and that many of my fellow young black male counterparts choose gangsta life over college.

But it wasn’t until college that I realized I had been ensnared in what John McWhorter calls the “Cult of Victimology.” One of my professor’s pointed me toward a world of literature I’d never been introduced to: Thomas Sowell, John McWhorter, Shelby Steele, Star Parker, Angela McGlowan, Larry Elder, Walter Williams—they obliterated the Leftist foolishness that floods my community.

It was then that my eyes were opened to the truth, a truth that my father was willing to give his life for, a truth that hundreds of thousands of American soldiers have paid the ultimate price to pass on to future generations. And that truth is this: America remains the greatest country that God gave to man.

So imagine me, a member of various organizations that largely consist of young black Americans, most of whom are womb to the tomb Democrats and liberals, speaking openly about the many opportunities and blessings we enjoy in our great nation and refuting Michelle Obama’s supposition that America is a “downright mean place..”

Can you say…..social suicide?

"So Jerome,” the partygoers asked, “you’re REALLY a Republican?!"

Duh!

Of course I’m a Republican! And your great grandparents were too!

Yes, I’m a member of the Anti-Slavery Party, the party responsible for: the 13th (abolished slavery), 14th (gave former slaves full citizenship rights), the 15th Amendment (gave slaves voting rights), the Civil Rights Act of 1871(protecting southern blacks from the Ku Klux Klan), the Reconstruction Acts, and the 1866, 1875, 1957, 1960, and 1964 Civil Rights Acts.

And no, my brothers and sisters, yesterday’s southern Democrats are NOT today’s Republicans! If so, former Klansman, Sen. Robert Byrd—the highest ranking senate Democrat and President Pro-Tempore of the Senate—apparently didn’t get the memo and forgot to switch parties.

But it’s more than just the history. I’m proud to stand for self-empowerment, personal responsibility, strong family values, small government, low taxes, free markets, a strong military, and individual achievement etc.

And don’t even get me started on which side stands up for the precious 1.4 million unborn children (32% of whom are black), who will be casualties in the war inside the womb. When I see these so-called “black leaders” bashing conservatives for “racist policies,” I wonder how they justify cheering on the political team who proudly defends the annihilation of 13 million black children since 1973.

And conservatives don’t care about black people? I don’t think so!

No, I think I’ll ride with the team who says enough with the welfare cancer that has destroyed people’s innate desire to achieve. Yes, I’ll ride with the folks who respect me enough to consider me their equal and not insult me with Affirmative Action racism. Yeah, I’ll ride with the gang who would rather create effective policies than emotional “feel good” symbolism that robs individuals of their desire to aspire.

So while it may take a little getting used to walking into college parties where I’m known as “The Black Republican,” I now realize I am a newly inducted member of a rich tradition of ideologically emancipated black conservatives. And guess what? I’m more than cool with that. I’m proud, actually.

“The conservative Kanye West”?

Hmmm….

Has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?

Jerome Hudson is a sophomore at Tallahassee Community College with plans to transfer to Florida A&M University in the fall.